.
.
.
等瑞秋端着托盘离开了,几人赶紧把各自的饮品换回来。
刚分好,菲比嘴里念叨着什么进来了,自顾自地坐在了格拉斯旁边,吓得格拉斯又往钱德勒身上凑了凑。
ChandlerRelax, she's across the Atlantic from you.
Chandler(别紧张,你们中间隔了个大西洋呢)
ChandlerAnd you're coming in me.
Chandler(而且你都快进来了)
Glass… Sorry, uh-
GlassI just can't help it.
Glass(我只是忍不住)
JoeyWhat's going on?
PhoebeI'm going through my mail, and I open up their monthly,
Phoebeyou know, "STATEMENT"
Phoebe(所谓的“通知”)
GlassSo what?
PhoebeAnd there's five hundred extra dollars in my account.
Phoebe(然后我发现我的账户上多了五百元)
吸好运!
ChandlerOh, Satan's minions at work again…
Chandler(撒旦的爪牙又来祸害人间了…)
GlassSo where should we find him?
两人相视一笑,都看出了对方心中所想。
然后…
ChandlerLet's be quick and light.
Chandler(快一点,轻一点)
两人轻轻翻到沙发后,猫着腰溜到吧台。
格拉斯朝身后撇了几眼,做足了“鬼鬼祟祟”的样子,然后看着甘瑟敲了敲桌子。
甘瑟严肃地点头,从哪儿摸出来个小盒子,遮在手心里递给了格拉斯。
整个过程行云流水,钱德勒目瞪口呆地看着格拉斯。
ChandlerI think I found Satan!
等两个人偷溜回去的时候,先是躲在沙发后面点好烟,然后又在暗搓搓地商量。
ChandlerJust light one and we can take turns smoking.
Chandler(我们就点一支烟,轮流抽)
GlassSure!
……
PhoebeI'd never be able to enjoy it.
PhoebeIt would be like this giant karmic debt.
Phoebe(因为这就像是沉重的因果报应一样)
GlassHey, it's my turn!
Glass(该我了!)
格拉斯抓着钱德勒的手,连带着把烟也从他嘴里拽了出来。
GlassGood.
然后直接凑过去狠狠吸了一口,连两个人的脸都蹭到一起了也没发现。
ChandlerOh, God…
MonicaHey, you two.
MonicaWhat're you doing?
见两人撅着屁股都没反应,莫妮卡直接拽着两人的腿把他们拽了回来。
GlassOh, don't touch me…
随着格拉斯嘴巴一张一合,一团白烟飘出来散得到处都是。
PhoebeOh my God!
MonicaOh, no!
RossWhat're you… What is that?
RachelOkay, Glass?
格拉斯瞪着眼睛死死抓着钱德勒的衣服,简直像极了濒死之人抓住了救命稻草的样子。
GlassI'm dying! I'm dying! I'm dying!
钱德勒扬起招牌笑容,一条胳膊揽着格拉斯的背防止他带着两个人都摔倒。
ChandlerI'm smoking. I'm smoking. I'm smoking.
PhoebeOh, I can't believe you.
PhoebeYou've been so good for three years!
Phoebe(你一直都表现良好,三年了!)
RachelAnd Glass.
RachelYou little liar!
Rachel(你这个小骗子!)
RachelYou told me in high school that you quit smoking!
PhoebeOh my goodness...
RachelSo many years, why?!
Glass……
ChandlerSo,
钱德勒举起了那半支烟。
Chandlerthis is our reward!
Chandler(这就是我们的奖励!)
格拉斯被瑞秋凶得不敢说话,但身体却很诚实地点头。
RossOkay, hold on a second, alright?
RossYou guys,
Rossjust think about what you went through the last time you quit.
Ross(想想戒烟后是怎么活过来的)
格拉斯抿了抿嘴,盯着瑞秋的死亡凝视弱弱开口。
GlassActually, I never stop smoking…
Rachel… Oh my God.
RossOkay, Chandler.
RossForget about you.
RossThink about what we went through!
Ross(至少想想我们是怎么过来的!)
ChandlerOkay, so this time I won't quit!
Chandler(所以这次我不戒了!)
ChandlerAnd I have something to ask you.
GlassOkay.
RossNo, no, no!
MonicaPut it out!
PhoebePut it out!
ChandlerOkay, okay, okay…
钱德勒马上就要把烟扔到菲比的咖啡里,格拉斯突然凑了过来。
GlassOnce again! Just once!
Glass(再给我来一口,就一口!)
RachelGlass!
格拉斯干脆把烟叼了过来,翻身躲到钱德勒身后。
GlassThe enemy is coming, run away!
Glass(敌军来了,快撤!)
.
MonicaAlright, I'm gonna go change,
Monica(好了,我去换衣服了)
MonicaI've got a date.
瑞秋马上转移了注意力。
RachelSo is it Allen again?
RachelHow's it going?
莫妮卡笑容甜蜜,看上去进展不错。
Monica'S'going pretty good, y'know?
Monica(进展还不错)
JoeyOh, so when do we get to meet the guy?
RossYeah!
GlassMust show me what he is.
Glass(我得看看他是个什么货色)
MonicaLet's me see,
Monicatoday's Monday…
MonicaNever.
Monica(永远别想)
说完就要走,这下这帮家伙可不乐意了。
PhoebeOh, come on!
GlassYou can't kill our curiosity!
MonicaNo. Not after what happened with Steve.
Monica(不可能,从史蒂夫那次之后就别想了)
ChandlerWhat are you talking about?
ChandlerWe love Schhteve!
Chandler(我们都爱史蒂胡)
GlassOh, yeah.
GlassSchhteve was schhexy!
Glass(史蒂胡很shìng感)
格拉斯是从钱德勒那里知道的史蒂夫的详情。众人被钱德勒和格拉斯模仿的“史蒂夫口音”逗笑,钱德勒又趁乱从格拉斯嘴边抢了一口。
GlassOh stop! You little thief!
Glass(住口!你这小贼!)
GlassIt's the end!
Glass(这可是最后一口!)
ChandlerBut this belongs to both of us!
GlassI hid it!
Glass(是我藏的!)
ChandlerOkay, I am the first,
Chandler(我抽了第一口)
Chandlerso you must allow me to start and finish!
Chandler(所以最后一口也是我的!)
GlassFor what? Then you are more than me!
Glass(凭什么?那你不就比我抽得多了吗!)
两个人突然就因为一支烟吵了起来,莫妮卡已经走了,罗斯和菲比无可奈何地吐槽了两句,而乔伊还在纠结二弟的长短问题。
PhoebeOh God…
RossJoey, let it go.
Ross(乔伊,放过它吧)
ChandlerGive it to me, I will bury it!
Chandler(把它给我,我要安葬它!)
GlassNo way!
Phoebe……
Ross……
Joey……
.
.
.
———
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Unfinished to be continued