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.
.
GlassUr… Hi, Monica.
老实说,他真的不想这个时候过来的,但是家里两个“嗷嗷待哺”的家伙…
他发誓,拿完盐就走。
GlassCan you um…
GlassCan you give some salt?
Glass(能给我些盐吗?)
格拉斯想早点儿跑,而对于饱受“家庭聚餐”折磨的莫妮卡来说,格拉斯此刻就是她的天使。
MonicaSure!
然后忙不迭地把本来只打算在门口等的格拉斯拽了进来。
Glass… Hi?
来自盖勒一家的注视。
"Oh, whose family does the little boy belong to?"
(这个小男孩是谁家的?)
GlassWell, maybe you happened to know that the Greens have a son.
Glass(也许你碰巧知道格林家还有个儿子)
"What? They have a son?"
"The Greens you said is the one we know?"
(你说的格林是我们知道的那个格林吗?)
莫妮卡尴尬地笑了笑,格拉斯没有回答他们,只是自嘲地扯了下嘴角。
GlassIt seems that the coincidence did not happen.
Glass(看来并不碰巧)
MonicaOkay, he's my friend.
MonicaBe kind.
Monica(友好点)
莫妮卡和格拉斯走到厨房,罗斯一脸警惕地盯着格拉斯的背影。
"I thought Monica had a student boyfriend."
(我还以为莫妮卡找了个学生当男朋友。)
RossThen I have to say goodbye to my good days.
Ross(那我的好日子就到头了)
听着客厅里的聊天内容,莫妮卡和格拉斯在厨房“偷偷密谋”。
MonicaNow that you have come, do me a favor.
Monica(来都来了,帮我个忙吧)
GlassWhat?
莫妮卡朝盖勒夫妇看了一眼,格拉斯顺着也看过去。
MonicaRoss's misfortune has failed to attract them.
Monica(罗斯的倒霉事儿已经吸引不了他们了)
Glass… So?
格拉斯攥着盐罐警惕地后退一步。
MonicaMaybe…
MonicaBe my boyfriend for a while?
Monica(暂时做我男朋友?)
GlassWoah…
GlassMaybe, um…
GlassI think…
MonicaYou don't wanna see little Mon wronged, right?
Monica(你不想看到可怜的小莫受委屈吧?)
看到格拉斯纠结的眉毛拧起,等同于看到了希望。
莫妮卡眼神亮了亮。
再接再励,再添一把火!
MonicaThen Ross will be elated.
Monica(那罗斯可要高兴坏了)
果然,格拉斯瞬间调整好了表情,自信认真地拉起莫妮卡的手。
GlassCome on.
格拉斯“气势汹汹”拉着莫妮卡朝客厅走,莫妮卡在他身后小声喊了句“Yes!”,捂着嘴偷笑了一下,然后一脸羞涩地出现在客厅三人面前。
格拉斯其实听到了那句“Yes!”,他轻轻笑了笑,没说什么。
如果屏蔽掉那满脑子的“女神好可爱”之类的话。
所以盖勒夫妇和盖勒王子(不是)见到的就是这样一副情景:年轻帅气的男生一脸宠溺地勾着嘴角,身后牵着偷吃糖果被抓包一样羞涩的女孩。
郎才女貌,天作之合,甜腻腻的爱情…
RossPlease go back to the kitchen and do it again.
RossI didn't quite see what was going on.
Ross(请回去重来一遍,我没太看清是怎么回事)
格拉斯不紧不慢地拉开椅子请莫妮卡坐下,然后盯着满脸惊恐的罗斯懒散地拖着音调。
GlassOh? Yes?
Glass(哦?是吗?)
GlassNever mind.
GlassThat's not a problem.
"Monica?"
"Is there any incredible reversal?"
(出现了什么不可思议的反转吗?)
MonicaI'm sorry, I'm so sorry.
莫妮卡一脸甜蜜地说着抱歉的话,罗斯的表情变幻莫测。
RossBut you don't look sorry.
MonicaI lied.
Monica(我撒谎了)
"No, you really found a baby to be your boyfriend?"
格拉斯眉头一皱。
GlassSorry, Mrs Geller… A baby?
GlassI've graduated from college, okay?
盖勒夫人优雅地扶了扶她浅金色的卷发,目光挑剔地看了他一眼。
"So, what do you do?"
Glass……
余光瞥到罗斯看戏的眼神,格拉斯清了清嗓。
GlassI'm not very outstanding.
GlassI just work in a small restaurant…
"Oh…"
做作地发出感叹,然后目露怜悯地看着莫妮卡。
莫妮卡熟悉那种眼神,坐在椅子上并不好受。
Glassas a manager.
Monica?!
RossWhat?!
"A manager…"
"Which one?"
(哪家餐厅的?)
格拉斯故意皱起眉头,一副很难为情的样子。
盖勒夫人又“体谅”的摆了摆手,却遮掩不住上扬的嘴角。
"It doesn't matter. Many celebrities start their efforts in unknown places."
(没关系,很多名人都是从不知名的小地方开始努力的。)
GlassOh… What a pity!
GlassMany senior executives of the company wouldn't let us speak out,
Glassfor fear that ordinary customers would rob the seats.
Glass(好多公司高层人员都不让我们说出来,怕那些普通顾客跟他们抢地方)
"……"
盖勒夫妇目瞪口呆看着对方,罗斯却是满脸不信,莫妮卡惊喜地转头看着格拉斯,眼底的惊喜不知道是因为他隐藏的实力还是他真的能帮她解决今天烦心的“家庭聚餐”。
MonicaReally?
MonicaI thought you were just a waiter in a small restaurant.
Monica(我以为你只是一家小餐厅的一个小服务员而已)
格拉斯的笑容僵了一瞬,但很快就恢复正常。
GlassSo it shows how much you love me.
Glassos: She won't believe it all, will she?
Glass(os:她不会全信了吧?)
盖勒夫人的脸色变得很难看,而相比之下,盖勒先生就好很多。
"I know!"
(我就知道我女儿有这魅力!)
"When you were chubby, there was a boy who kept sending you flowers."
(你还胖嘟嘟的时候就有个小子一直送你花。)
Glass……
Monica……
巧了不是?
GlassIt's ur… it's me.
"… Wow, you're really really really crazy!"
.
JoeyYour folks are really that bad, huh?
Joey(你爸妈真的很不怎么样啊)
ChandlerAnd our roommate's really great!
ChandlerNow I forgive you for leaving us for dinner.
ChandlerAlone in the enemy camp…
Chandler(一人孤身入敌营…)
Chandlerand directly reversed the war!
Chandler(直接扭转了战局!)
GlassNo… I just…
GlassMonica is good enough.
GlassShe deserves the love and respect of her parents.
Glass(她应该得到父母的爱和尊重)
MonicaThank you.
MonicaAnd I know they say you can't change your parents…
Monica(常言讲,父母是无法交换的)
Monicaif you could-- I'd want yours.
Monica(如果可以,我想要你的父母)
被莫妮卡指着的罗斯无奈笑笑,起身亲了下她的额头。
RossMust pee.
Ross(我去尿尿)
然后背影潇洒地走向卫生间…
PhoebeY'know, it's even worse when you're twins.
Phoebe(如果是双胞胎,情况会更惨)
给客人端完咖啡的瑞秋突然凑过来。
RachelYou're twins?
Rachel(你是双胞胎?)
PhoebeYeah. We don't speak.
Phoebe(对,但是我们不往来)
PhoebeShe's like high-powered, driven career type.
Phoebe(她是那种精力充沛、事业心强的人)
GlassA crazy office talent?
Glass(办公室达人?)
PhoebeNo, she's a waitress.
RachelWow, but those are not the case with glass and me.
Rachel(你们说的情况我跟格拉斯之间就没有)
Glass……
RachelGlass?
ChandlerWell, it doesn't look like what you said.
Chandler(看来并不像你说的那样)
RachelGlass, say something.
GlassI… I ur… Nothing…
GlassI mean…
GlassI want your parents.
RachelOh my god…
PhoebeOkay, come on.
菲比伸开双臂轻轻招手,把两个小可怜抱在怀里。
RachelAll right, you guys.
RachelI kinda gotta clean up.
瑞秋把钱德勒搭在茶几上的腿拍开,其余几人也纷纷起身。
MonicaChandler, you're an only child, right?
Monica(钱德勒你是独生子对吧?)
MonicaYou don't have any of this.
Monica(你就没有这些困扰)
ChandlerWell, no.
ChandlerAlthough I did have an imaginary friend who…
Chandler(但是我有一个想象中的的朋友)
Chandlermy parents actually preferred.
Chandler(而我爸妈比较喜欢他)
GlassOkay. But I believe they love you.
格拉斯安慰地抱住了钱德勒,接着他感受到自己背上的温度。
ChandlerSo I also believe that your parents love you.
Glass……
GlassIf they lose holiday gifts from their son,
Glass(如果他们弄丢了儿子送的节日礼物)
Glasseat their son's favorite pet,
Glass(吃掉儿子最喜欢的宠物)
Glassand treat their son as important as the air every day, except when they need him…
Glass(而且把他当成空气)
GlassIf those acts are called love, they do love me deeply.
Glass(如果那些行为叫做“爱”的话,他们的确深爱着我)
Chandler……
两人慢慢落到队尾,顺手关上灯和门。
格拉斯回头看了一眼,他记得罗斯还在卫生间,但他不打算管。
GlassWhat's up? Mr. Cold Joke had no electricity?
Glass(怎么?冷笑话先生没电了吗?)
钱德勒看着他,夜色下的蓝眼睛并不算明亮,甚至有些泛灰…
ChandlerYes, he needs someone to recharge his batteries.
Chandler(是啊,需要有人帮他充一下电)
GlassWell... It seems that the teacher will change tonight.
Glass(看来今晚要换老师了)
ChandlerOh oh oh, wait wait wait.
钱德勒浮夸地抖了抖全身,然后扬起笑容。
ChandlerAnd now I have electricity!
GlassWhat?
格拉斯笑了笑,抬头看了看月亮。
GlassFrom the moon?
钱德勒也抬起头,那月亮并不完美,灰溜溜地裹挟在藏蓝色的幕布里,像极了…
ChandlerWell… Maybe.
.
.
.
———
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Unfinished to be continued